How do you de-stress as a parent to young children?
Take a moment. Stop reading this (but please do come back!) and take thirty seconds, a minute or as long as you need to think about your mind and all that it does for you. Our minds are precious. Do you look after yours in the same way that you would your physical health? If not, consider why not?
We’re joined by guest experts Rebecca Elsom, Alliance (Early Years Development Officer), and Gary Croxon, (Alliance business manager) from Early Years Alliance to help you figure out how you can de-stress as a parent, sharing tips and ideas that you can establish in your daily routine.
Welcome Back
In the past, there has tended to be a stigma around discussing mental health but perhaps one positive outcome of the global events within the recent years is that our collective awareness of mental health, and the need to discuss it, has increased. It feels slightly easier now to talk about mental health, both our own and that of others, including children.
Lots of things change when you become a parent/carer, and quite often your own wellbeing becomes neglected, as other things take priority. However, if we are going to be good role models for our children, it is vital that we show them how important taking care of our own mental health really is.
Struggles That You May Face As A Parent / Carer
You may find it difficult to take care of your own physical health – perhaps you exercise less than you did before, don’t feel you get a chance to eat a healthy and balanced diet, or that you are not getting enough sleep. All of these things can impact how you feel physically but also mentally and emotionally.
It might be that you experience repeated feelings of guilt or worry – this might be not feeling ‘good enough’ or that you are worried you haven’t got enough time to get all of those other things done, perhaps around chores around the house or doing the shopping. Finding a balance here is important – prioritising your time between looking after yourself, spending time with the children and feeling in control of everything else. Sometimes this can become quite overwhelming and begin to impact on your own mental health.
It may be difficult to establish a new routine. As we already said, lots of things change when you become a parent/carer, and it can sometimes be tricky to work out this ‘new way of life’ and how your day-to-day life is now different. Perhaps you find it difficult to get out and about or struggle to make it to appointments on time.
Being a parent/carer can sometimes feel quite lonely, especially if you are finding it difficult to get out and about. It can help to be around others who are in a similar situation, perhaps by making friends at local early years stay and play groups or attending public spaces that are designed to attract families with younger children. Surrounding yourself with like-minded people, those that understand the struggles of being a parent/carer, can be a comfort and support.
So How Can We De-Stress As A Parent / Carer And Promote Positive Mental Health And Wellbeing?
First and foremost, acknowledging that it is important to take care of your own mental health and wellbeing is the most important step. After all, we aren’t going to be ‘firing on all cylinders’ and be the best parent/carer we want to be for our children if we aren’t looking after ourselves. What’s that saying used at the start of a flight? Make sure your own oxygen mask is on before you help others.
What is good support for one person may not be for another, and some of the below points you might find more helpful than others. Creating your own ‘wellbeing list’ with what supports your mental health will help you to reflect and give you ideas of steps that will best support you and your mental wellbeing.
Here are some of our ideas:
Get outside for a walk or jog, and use all of your senses to immerse yourself in what is around you. Depending on the weather or time of day, you will have a different experience each time.
Exercise to the level you can manage, building up to a goal. When you exercise, your body releases endorphins which produces a positive feeling in the body.
Relax – read a book, take a bath or do something else you enjoy (or combine all three!)
Make sure you are getting enough sleep. Sleep helps the mind to process and ‘file’ our memories, emotions and thoughts about the day.
Talk about how you are feeling. If someone asks if you are okay, does your reply of “I’m fine” have any truth? Find a good time to talk to a friend and/or family or a colleague. Walking and talking is often a better way to get your thoughts and feelings heard, rather than just sitting down with a cuppa.
We know it might not always be easy to find the time within your busy life as a parent/carer to de-stress, but your first step could be just one minute of breathing and relaxing – it’s a starting point and just take it from there!
Early Years Alliance
For more FREE information, advice and tips on supporting your child’s early learning and development, visit the Early Years Alliance’s Family corner website. Family Corner is the family arm of the Early Years Alliance, offering expert articles, activity ideas and online learning sessions on key areas of child development such as learning through play, communication, behaviour, health, nutrition and wellbeing.
Want To Get Out And About, Have Fun With Your Baby Or Toddler, And Meet Other Parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5’s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
If you are looking for stocking fillers for your baby, look no further!
It’s the most wonderful time of the year. Maybe it is your baby’s first Christmas, or the first Christmas that they are more aware of the fun and festivities around them.
We asked Team Happity to share what they are putting in their baby’s stocking, either for this year or past year’s favourites. We are excited to be gathering Christmas gifts but we are also thinking about ways of saving money and getting bargains too. So put on your Christmas jumper and settle in for some great tips!
Where To Buy
Buying gifts online can save the stress of being in busy shops in the run up to Christmas with a baby and a buggy in tow. There are lots of online shops that offer a huge range of toys and gifts with good discounts. You could also try Vinted (perfect for pre-loved baby clothes) or your local Facebook Marketplace (great for preloved baby toys!). Buying second hand often helps you to get lots of bargains and is good for the environment too.
Or maybe you have things in your house you can use already- such as cooking utensils. Maybe a smooth wooden or silicone spoon or spatula, or a saucepan would make a fun toy. (Although babies must be supervised with these, and they must be checked that they are not cracked or damaged before or during play) Or make some sensory toys yourself, such as putting waterproof small toys or pieces of fruit in ice cubes for your little ones to marvel over. Or even a (clean) dust pan brush! The possibilities are endless.
Baby Stocking Fillers For £5 Or Under
Books
We love reading books to our babies, and small books are great stocking fillers for your baby. Some of the highlights for Team Happity are “Dear Zoo”, and the “That’s Not My…” series. Anything with flaps or textures are a hit with our little ones!
Buggy books are perfect too- often a smaller version of the original board book, these come with clips or little straps to attach to your buggy. So even if your baby drops it you will not lose your book! Another of our favourites is the classic “Very Hungry Caterpillar”!
Sticker books are also perfect for little ones who adore playing with stickers. Some come with colouring pages too!
Recommended
Dear Zoo – by Rod Campbell
Lift the flap and meet the many different animals that live in the zoo!
Something practical yet a great gift, a nice smelling bubble bath is a great addition to your stocking. Child’s Farm bedtime bubble scented with tangerines is one we particularly love! (and great for sensitive or eczema prone skin)
Some things can be necessities but also gifts! We love baby socks with grippy soles, perfect for when they start cruising along the furniture. Or it could be something that benefits parents when out and about with baby – like a beautifully soft pram mit, perfect for keeping your hands warm while your baby is snug in their pram! And of course Christmas is not complete without Christmas pyjamas. Baby PJs can often be customised and we can’t believe how adorable the designs are!
Hide And Squeak Eggs
Something nearly everyone on Team Happity mentioned is their love for squeaky eggs! This is definitely a firm favourite, keeping little ones busy sorting their eggs. We even have found a version of the eggs that stack, for the real squeaky egg fans!
Special Baby Stocking Fillers
If you are looking for something a bit bigger, or maybe your stocking is your main focus for Christmas gifts for your baby, you may like to think about these.
Lastly, although more pricey than some gifts, the Toniebox can be enjoyed for many years to come. This digital audio player for children plays stories and songs, without buttons or a screen. Our younger ones have listened to nursery rhymes or favourites like the Gruffalo, whilst our older ones use it for Horrible Histories.
These are genuine recommendations of products and toys that we love, and are not sponsored or generating commission.
Looking For New Homes For Your Existing Toys?
If your baby has been lucky enough to receive lots of gifts, it may be that you have some older toys that you no longer use, or even duplicate toys. It might be a good idea to have a clear out, whilst helping others families too. Circle of Toys is a children’s social project, all about connecting people with surplus toys to families who really need them. The project has only just started and they’ve already responded to over 7000 heartfelt requests! They happily accept both used and new toys.
Enjoy This Special Time With Your Baby
This is a time to make special memories with your baby, and the busy schedule of Christmas can make it a stressful time. Make sure you take some time out to just relax with your baby, sing some Christmas songs with them, and take lots of photos that you can look back on and cherish.
Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5’s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
Here’s our useful guide to flying for the first time with your toddler!
Ah, the excitement of jetting off on a family adventure! Whether it’s a long-awaited holiday or a visit to family, flying with a toddler can be an adventure in itself.
Helen Holding, Growth Marketing Assistant for Team Happity, shares her experience of flying with her toddler on a recent long-haul flight! This was her first flight with her daughter, on a flight from London to Orlando – she shares some tips of what she found helpful!
Planes, Peppa, And Plenty Of Snacks
First things first, pack your bag with an arsenal of distractions. Think books, small toys, and maybe even a child-friendly tablet loaded with your toddler’s favourite episodes of Peppa Pig. I also had lots of new small toys (or toys she had not seen for a while) to keep my toddler engaged. We got a bag of age-appropriate fidget toys too. Colouring and books to read are great too. But nothing with too many loose pieces that can get lost in the seats! Snacks are your secret weapon – the promise of a tasty treat can work wonders when it comes to keeping little ones entertained.
For toddlers, make your child’s trip to the airport extra exciting by giving them their very own suitcase! A Trunki is a good option because they are sturdy enough for your child to sit on them when their little legs get tired, but small enough for them to pull along when they’re feeling adventurous.
Time Those Flights Right
Consider booking flights that fit in with your toddler’s natural sleep schedule. A nap on the plane can be a game-changer, leaving you with a more relaxed and contented travel companion. If you’re facing a long-haul journey, night flights might just be your new best friend. We got our toddler into her PJs in the airport just before the flight, and we were lucky enough to get her to sleep most of the way through one of the plane journeys!
Boarding Brilliance
Take advantage of early boarding. This gives you extra time to settle in, stow away the multitude of bags you’ve inevitably brought, and get your toddler comfortable in their seat. Plus, there’s the added bonus of avoiding the rush and giving your little one some space to explore before the cabin fills up. Some airlines allow families with younger children to board first anyway – our recent flight did and it felt great being one of the first ones on!
Go With The Flow
Prepare to throw the rulebook out of the window (or airplane door, in this case). Toddlers are unpredictable, and sometimes the best-laid plans can go astray. Embrace the chaos, go with the flow, and don’t be too hard on yourself – or your little one – if things don’t go according to plan.
Snuggle Up
Flying can be overwhelming for little ones, so make sure to pack their favourite comfort items. Whether it’s a beloved blanket, a stuffed animal, or even a well-worn copy of ‘The Gruffalo’. Having a familiar item can provide a sense of security in the unfamiliar skies. We had some favourite cuddly toys with us to remind us of home.
High-Flying Wardrobe
Opt for comfortable and layered clothing for both you and your toddler. Airplane temperatures can be unpredictable, and having layers gives you flexibility and will keep you comfy.
Take Turns And Tag Team
If you’re flying with a partner or another family member, take turns being the primary toddler wrangler. This way, each of you gets a bit of a break, and your toddler gets the chance to interact with different people. It’s a win-win. If your little one is under two and still on your lap, you’ll be sharing a seat belt extender. This is very quick to move between seats, so feel free to swap around!
Be Prepared For Ear Popping
The change in air pressure during take-off and landing can be tough on little ears. Have a sippy cup, bottle, or snacks on hand to encourage swallowing, which can help equalise ear pressure.
Lavatory Logistics
Navigating airplane bathrooms with a toddler can be a tight squeeze. Familiarise yourself with the layout before you actually need to use it, and don’t be shy about asking flight attendants for help. They’re often seasoned pros at these mid-air acrobatics. Although I found it a bit tricky changing a toddler in a small plane toilet on the pull down baby changing table, I managed and just got my nappy sacks, wipes etc out ready so I wasn’t fiddling with the whole bag!
Smile And Wave
Lastly, remember that people around you were once toddlers too (probably). Most fellow passengers will be sympathetic to your cause, so don’t be afraid to exchange a smile or a friendly wave. Do not worry too much about noise, as most people will be watching films/have headphones on, and airplane cabins are surprisingly noisy already! This is why I love noise cancelling headphones on planes. I found walking up and down the aisle a great way to pass time. We made friends with some other small children which was nice. A little bit of camaraderie can go a long way.
Bon voyage, fellow families! May your flights be turbulence-free and your toddlers be delightfully entertained. Safe travels!
Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5’s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
As we navigate the rollercoaster of parenthood, we know that thinking about the future can sometimes be a daunting task. However, there’s an important topic that would be useful to look at as a parent: writing a will.
While it may not be the most cheerful topic, it’s an act of love that ensures your children are taken care of in the event the unexpected happens. It’s more of a reassurance for you -and nothing more. So, brew a cuppa, relax, and let’s chat about will writing as a parent.
Why Write A Will When You Become A Parent?
Imagine your will as a roadmap for your family’s future. It’s a way to express your wishes and ensure your children are looked after if you’re not around. Writing a will provides clarity on who will inherit your assets, including your home, savings, and sentimental possessions. If you have children from a previous relationship, you can make sure they are not left out. More importantly, it allows you to appoint guardians for your little ones, ensuring they’re raised by someone you trust.
Choosing Guardians
Selecting guardians for your children is a big decision. Think about choosing people who share your values, parenting style, and, most importantly, your love for your little ones. Discuss this with your chosen guardians beforehand, ensuring they are willing and able to take on this responsibility.
Assets And Finances
Break out the spreadsheet! List your assets, savings, investments, and any debts. Be specific about who gets what and how it should be managed. This ensures that your wishes are clear and minimises the chance of family disputes. It could be worth looking at life insurance as a means to provide financial support for your family.
Will Writing As A Parent Is Hard! Get Professional Help
While the internet is a treasure trove of information, consulting a professional is important when it comes to will writing. Solicitors and will writing services can guide you through the legal process, ensuring your will is valid and accurately reflects your wishes. It’s a small investment for peace of mind. Some will writing companies can do it all through phone calls and email, making it more convenient when you have a busy family schedule.
You can find out more about solicitors and what the process could involve through this page at Citizens Advice
Regular Updates
Life is a journey, and circumstances change. Births, deaths, marriages, and divorces can all impact your will. Make it a habit to review and update your will periodically, especially after significant life events. This way, it stays relevant to your family’s needs.
Including Your Wishes For Your Children
Take the opportunity to express your wishes regarding your children’s education, values, and any specific instructions you may have. This personal touch will help your loved ones understand your hopes and dreams for your family.
Writing a will might not be the most glamorous task, but it is an essential expression of your love and can put your mind at ease. It’s a way to provide for your family, even when you’re not there. So, let’s ensure that our children will continue to feel our love and guidance, no matter what the future holds.
Remember, you’re not alone in this journey. Get support from professionals, discuss your wishes openly with your family, and embrace the peace of mind that comes from knowing you’ve taken steps to secure your family’s future.
Disclaimer: The team at Happity have put together this resource after doing extensive research from reliable resources. However, we ourselves do not claim to be lawyers and recommend you consult with your own resources on these matters.
Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5’s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
With the amount of variety out there, how do you pick the best car seat for your baby or toddler?
As a new parent, your child’s safety is a top priority, especially when it comes to travelling by car. Finding the best car seat might seem daunting, so we’re here to help shed some light on what’s what in the car seat world!
The Best Car Seat To Suit Your Child’s Age
There are typically three categories of car seat for your baby or toddler:
1. Infant Car Seats
These rear-facing car seats are designed for newborns and can be easily removed from the car. They are super convenient if your baby is sleeping, because you can take them out of the car easily without disturbing their nap! Many infant car seats can be attached to a pushchair chassis using handy adaptors. This is great if you’re nipping out to the shops and your baby is still asleep when you arrive.
It’s important to remember that young babies shouldn’t be left in a car seat for extended periods. Some brands sell reclining car seats that enable you to lay your little one flat when the car seat has been removed from the car.
Infant car seats are designed for babies from birth up to 15 months old.
“The first car seat we got was a Maxi-Cosi. We chose this because it is great for newborns, very comfy with a shade to keep out the sun, and compatible with our pram. We found it a bit daunting buying our first car seat when we knew nothing about babies or car seats, so we had a nursery consultant appointment at a department store. They were super helpful, showed us all of the car seats on the shop floor, and had a realistically weighted baby doll to show us how to use the car set properly (I was still pregnant at the time so no baby to demo on!!) as well as how to attach to a car seat they had as an example. They then helped us narrow down our choices, emailing us with our top three. We came back at a later date to buy the one we wanted.”
Helen – Happity Growth Marketing Assistant
2. Convertible car seats
Designed for babies and older children. They can be rear-facing initially and then converted to forward-facing as your child grows. Some can be used from birth all the way up to 12 years old. Really handy if you’re on a budget! Convertible car seats have baby inserts for new-borns and the backrest can be extended as your child gets bigger. When your child is around 5 or 6 years old, the harness can be stored away for your child to use the car seat with the car’s existing seatbelt.
“We bought a Joie Tilt, it converts from new-born all the way up to age 4 so it will last us quite a while. I chose this one as it is very lightweight, and very quick to install with just a seat belt. This is great as we don’t have a car, so perfect for fitting in other people’s cars if you are getting a lift or in a taxi. I’d also recommend a spare car seat if you have to switch between cars a lot. It is very comfortable, has washable seat fabric and suitable for forward facing or rear facing. It ticked all the boxes for me!”
Helen – Happity Growth Marketing Assistant
3. Booster Seats
Ideal for older kids, booster seats raise your child so that they can use the car’s existing seatbelt. Booster seats are available fairly cheaply, making them a great option if grandparents or other family members look after your child regularly and they want an affordable option for their car. There are both high-back and backless booster options available.
We had a convertible car seat for our son’s main car seat, and a couple of booster seats for our spare car and the grandparents’ car. They’re so lightweight and easy to move around and take in and out of the car, and because they don’t have a harness, they’re really affordable because there’s not much to them.”
Gayle – Happity Partnerships Marketing Assistant
ISOFIX Or Non-ISOFIX?
Both ISOFIX and non-ISOFIX are safe forms of car seat installation. Choosing the best option for you will depend on personal preference and whether or not your car is ISOFIX compatible. Here are a few pros and cons of both options:
ISOFIX
Pros:
Ease of Installation: ISOFIX car seats use anchor points that are built into the car. If you are not sure if your car has ISOFIX, check the car’s user manual to find out. Using ISOFIX makes it easier to insert and remove your child’s car seat as it slots neatly onto a fixed base.
Safety: With ISOFIX, you’re less likely to install the car seat incorrectly. It can give you extra peace of mind that your little one is safe. Switches, buttons or audible alerts indicate when the ISOFIX system has been installed correctly.
Cons:
Compatibility: Not all vehicles have ISOFIX anchor points.
Weight Limit: Some ISOFIX systems have weight limits, so may not be suitable for larger children. Check with the car seat manufacturer if you are unsure.
Non-ISOFIX:
Pros:
Versatility: Non-ISOFIX car seats are recommended to be used in any type of car. So this is the best car seat option if you don’t have ISOFIX points.
Transferring to other cars: If you’ll be transferring the car seat between different cars regularly, non-ISOFIX options tend to be less heavy and awkward to move around.
Convertible Options: Many convertible car seats that grow with your child may not rely on ISOFIX exclusively.
Cons:
Installation Complexity: Without ISOFIX, proper installation can be more challenging. You’ll be attaching the car seat to the car with the existing seat belt, which can be fiddly.
Which Car Seat Brands Are The best?
Several car seat brands for your baby or toddler are well-known for their safety, quality, and reliability, and they vary in price. Here are some brands to help you choose the best car seat to suit your needs and budget:
Maxi-Cosi
Known for their stylish, innovative designs, Maxi-Cosi car seats focus on both safety and comfort. They offer a range of car seats to suit your baby or child’s age, and some of their prices are a bit more affordable than other brands.
Joie
Another affordable option. Joie car seats provide a variety of options suitable for different ages and they offer an extended rear-facing option.
Cybex
Cybex car seats are popular for their sleek designs and advanced safety technology. They have side-impact protection and innovative installation systems. Some Cybex car seats use an impact shield instead of a harness. It’s a big, padded bumper that goes across the child’s waist instead of a harness. This offers extra protection when your child is forward-facing.
Britax Römer
Renowned for their robust safety features, including side-impact protection and user-friendly designs. Britax Römer offers a wide range of car seats suitable for various age groups.
Nuna
If you’re after a modern, sleek option, Nuna has it in spades! Their car seats also have convenient features such as easy installation and comfortable padding.
Cosatto
Jazz up the back seat with one of Cosatto’s colourful car seats! But don’t worry, their eye-catching styles aren’t just style over substance. They are built with safety in mind too.
Silver Cross
The Silver Cross brand has been around for almost 150 years. They know children! Their car seats focus on premium quality and safety, and they are another good option for those on a budget.
Choosing the best car seat for your little one might seem overwhelming but we hope these tips have answered some of the questions you might have had. If you are still unsure, you can book appointments at some shops to run through the different car seat options. With a bit of careful research and planning, you can find the best car seat for you and your child.
Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5’s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
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