Did you know that childcare support is expanding – and that you need to apply by the end of December to secure your support for January?
Working parents of children aged nine months to up to three years can now get 15 hours free childcare per week for 38 weeks a year. This will increase to 30 hours from September 2025 and is alongside the already existing 30 hours childcare for three and four-year-olds of working parents.
Childcare support can give your child a good start whilst giving you work choices, helping you juggle family life a little easier. You can check what support you might be eligible for using the online eligibility checker on the Childcare Choices website.
The deadline for eligible working parents to apply for support from 1st January 2025 is 31st December 2024. The Department for Education advises parents to apply as early as possible to get their childcare code.
In addition, some parents receiving support like Universal Credit or whose child has an Education, Health, and Care (EHC) Plan) can also access 15 hours for their two-year-old. Other offers available for eligible parents include Tax-Free Childcare and Universal Credit Childcare.
Since September, more wraparound childcare places for primary school-aged children have also become available, helping parents to juggle school drop-offs and pick-ups.
Looking for fun activities with your baby or toddler? There are thousands of classes and groups on Happity. Find one you’ll love here.
What Childcare Support Is Available For Different Ages?
Find out if you are eligible for any of the below on the Childcare Choices website.
2-Year-Old Offer (If You Claim Certain Government Support)
Explore childcare support for your family! If you receive some types of Government support, including Universal Credit, or your child has an Education, Care, Health (ECH) plan, you could get 15 hours childcare for your two-year old.
15 Hours Free Childcare: From 9 Months To 3 Years
There’s now more childcare support than ever before to help you juggle family life. If you are an eligible working parent with a child between nine months old up to three years old, you can get up to 15 hours childcare per week over 38 weeks of the year.
30 Hours Childcare: For Ages 3 Or 4
Childcare support is here to make balancing family life a little easier. If you are an eligible working parent with a child aged 3 or 4, you can get up to 30 hours childcare per week over 38 weeks of the year.
Wraparound Childcare: For School-Age Children 4+
Since September, more wraparound childcare places have become available, helping parents juggle school drop-offs and pick-ups more easily. You can use Tax-Free Childcare or Universal Credit Childcare to pay for wraparound childcare.
How Do I Apply?
Visit GOV.UK to apply for your code for a place in January 2025
Share the code with your childcare provider
If you’re planning to use your hours from 1st January 2025, you will need to apply by 31st December 2024
To continue receiving the government support, you will need to reconfirm your details every three months on your GOV.UK account
You can also subscribe to the newsletter on the Childcare Choices website to get further updates on changes in childcare support from September 2025
Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
It’s well known that shared reading with your baby or toddler has huge benefits for their social and intellectual development, not to mention their vocabulary.
But did you know that reading with your child can have positive influences from as young as two weeks old? We’re joined by Kayleigh Thornton from Reading Fairy Isleworth, who’s here to explain why it’s never too late to start reading with your baby or toddler and how to do this if you’re short on time and ideas.
Looking for fun activities with your baby or toddler? There are thousands of classes and groups on Happity. Find one you’ll love here.
Why Is Reading With Your Baby or Toddler From An Early Age So Important?
The Book Trust recently reported that although 95% of parents know the importance of reading to their children, only 42% of children have a bedtime story. They also reported that one in five children aged 0-4 years have a book read to them less than once a month.
At Reading Fairy we encourage reading for pleasure and we start early to build the foundations for confident readers. In my house, books are part of our daily routine, and I wanted to share with you three important reasons to start reading to your children from an early age, and five top tips to start that journey.
So do you read with your children? Would you like to start? It’s never too early to start to start shared reading with your baby, toddler or child. And here’s why.
Top 3 Reasons To Start Shared Reading With Your Baby Or Toddler
1. Reading Together Releases Oxytocin
When you snuggle up with your little one it strengthens the bond between you. The hormone oxytocin is released and you feel safe and loved. Later in life your child will associate feeling great with reading and will choose to read for fun.
2. Shared Reading With A Baby Or Toddler Boosts Educational Attainment
Reading improves vocabulary, concentration and memory, so being confident at reading is linked to educational attainment. Research has shown that children tend to make progress across all areas of the school curriculum when they are good readers. This means that reading for pleasure is a key indicator of future success.
3. Reading Together Promotes Emotional Wellbeing
Sharing stories with your child helps develop their emotional intelligence as well as creating a time and space to switch off from the world and get lost in adventures. So reading books with your children can help with their imagination and empathy.
Are you convinced? But not sure where to start? Read on for my five top tips on starting your reading journey with your child.
Top 5 Tips For Shared Reading With Your Young Child
1. Read Anywhere
You can read books on the go, anywhere you go: you don’t have to just read stories at bedtime or at home. I used to take a few board books out when we went to the doctors, coffee shop or on a train and get them out for the children to explore. My children are now older and will often pack a book with them when we head out to different places. Bath books are also a fab resource. Babies and toddlers can explore them at their own pace, with no worries about getting them wet.
2. Read Anything
Reading aloud is not always the most comfortable thing for a parent to do. When your children are young you can read anything to them: a recipe, a news article, a page from the book you are reading, leaflets and posters. The aim is to create a shared reading experience that is pleasurable for them so they are more likely to choose to pick up a book for pleasure when they are older
3. Read For As Long As You Can
Don’t worry if your little one’s attention span is short. Sometimes sharing books might be two minutes, sometimes it might be 20 minutes. Go with the pace of your child and don’t have an agenda. Even just ten minutes of shared reading time with your little one can create fantastic bonds and calming close time together.
4. Make Reading Fun
Does your little one choose the same book each time? Make it fun by changing voices, pitch or volume. Add in some sing-song voices or change the words to see if they notice. You can also make up stories with the pictures, allowing older toddlers to choose the ending. If you’re not super into the idea of making voices and getting a little bit dramatic with it, you could always try a Storytime class where the fun and theatrics will be done for you!
5. Change Up Your Reading Space
Sometimes when we are in the house, the day-to-day routine gets in the way of making time to read. So change it up. The best place to change it up is the local library. My children still love a trip to the library. It’s one of the only things that is totally FREE and they get to explore different types of books. Most children’s areas have seating so take some time to choose and share a book you may not have chosen before. Some of my children’s favourite books have come from our trips to the library.
So what are you waiting for? Grab a book, or magazine or comic and introduce your child to the wonders that stories can bring.
Did You Know This About Shared Reading With Your Child?
If you read a book every day to your child, by the time they are five years old they will have been read to 1825 times.
What a thought!
Now realistically this would be Dear Zoo 300 times, The Gruffalo 150 times, WOW! Said the Owl 73 times, Stick Man 243 times, Supertato 200 times, That’s Not My…..457 times, Each Peach Pear Plum 236 times and The Dinosaur Who Pooped series 166 times!
Happy reading!
Thanks To Kayleigh Thornton
Kayleigh Thornton from Reading Fairy Isleworth is an early reading expert who runs Reading Fairy classes for babies, toddlers and pre-schoolers in Isleworth, West London. Reading Fairy focuses on learning through play with nursery rhymes, interactive songs and picture books. You can book classes with Reading Fairy through Happity here
Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5’s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
What are some fun and easy activities to do while you’re breastfeeding or bottle-feeding your baby? Whether you’re bottle or breastfeeding, feeding your baby is such an important time to connect and bond with them. Stroking their hair/cheek, looking into their eyes, talking and singing to them, or simply giving them a cuddle all promotes the production of oxytocin and hormones which help your baby (and you) feel safe and loved.
But we’ve all been there: your baby has just fallen asleep on you after feeding and you think, ‘I’ll just check my phone for X, Y and Z’. 40 minutes later, your baby is starting to stir, you have cramp in your hand, and you emerge bleary-eyed from the rabbit hole of Googling something randomly linked to whatever it was you wanted to find in the first place. If it’s something medical that you’re searching, it’s easy to get lost for hours in the plethora of Mumsnet threads!
So here are 30 fun and easy activities to do while you’re bottle or breastfeeding that don’t involve doomscrolling.
Looking for fun activities with your baby or toddler? There are thousands of classes and groups on Happity. Find one you’ll love here.
Eleven Easy Things To Do One-Handed
If you’ve mastered the art of feeding or expressing one-handed, try these:
1. Plan Something Fun
Maybe you’re planning a party, Christening or playdate. Whatever it is, use this time to jot down a few ideas, either in a notebook or on your phone. It can be brilliant as a bit of a ‘brain dump’ to take stock and get out what’s in your head.
2. Read A Book
If your baby has fallen asleep and you’re able to hold a book one-handed, this can be an opportunity to read a chapter or two. Or if you have a Kindle or reading device, that’s easy to prop on your knee and ‘turn’ the pages with one hand.
3. Draw Or Doodle
Help cut through that brain fog by having a notebook and pen close to hand. It’s amazing what random connections can emerge when you just let your mind wander. If you’re stuck on what to write, maybe practise some gratitude and wellness: five things you are grateful for today or five things you’d like to do this week.
4. Use A Finger Strengthener
We all get cramps in our hands from holding and feeding baby. The beauty of finger strengtheners is that you can use them one-handed while cradling your baby in the other hand.
Side note: If you’re into any activities which use finger strength, like climbing, playing a musical instrument, skiing or gymnastics, finger strengtheners can be a great way to maintain that strength as well while you’re on maternity leave.
5. Eat A Nutritious Snack
Have a tub of flapjack to hand – all the better if it’s homemade. If you’re breastfeeding or expressing milk, you’ll need the extra energy! Other nutritious snacks include fruit, cereal and raisins/nuts, so graze away.
6. Write A One Line A Day Diary
Journalling is really popular and can help you release those thoughts and emotions as you navigate parenthood. We love this mum’s one line a day diary which only needs a couple of sentences or so to keep it going. It’s got space to add to every day for five years so it can be a great record to look back on too.
7. Play A Board Game Or Solve A Puzzle
This is one to do if you’re also looking after a toddler or have an older child. Any of the Orchard Toys card games are good, or maybe a jigsaw puzzle, Guess Who or Connect 4. For Scrabble, draughts or chess, you can leave a board set up on a table close by that’s easy to reach.
8. Make A List
There’s something satisfying about making a list by hand. It can be a to-do list, a list of things to buy, a list of favourite places to visit with baby or a list of things you feel happy about. If you’re not a fan of pen and paper, you could use a hand-held whiteboard or dictate a voice note to your phone.
9. Practise Learning A New Skill
Whether it’s learning how to crochet, reading up on a new crafting skill or playing the keyboard (yes, you really can do this one-handed if you have a free-standing keyboard!), make the most of this time to expand your knowledge and explore things you can do ready for when you have both hands available!
10. Do Some Mindfulness Colouring
Grab one of those adult colouring books and a pack of crayons or felt-tips. It’s amazing how calming this can be. There’s a whole range of mindfulness colouring books here or you can download individual sheets.
11. Snuggle Or Read With Your Toddler
If you have two children and want to spend some time with both of them while you’re feeding, you can cradle one under each arm and read. Some of the closest moments you have with your elder child or toddler can be spent like this, so be confident that you are giving them the attention you both need.
Seven Simple Things To Do While Breastfeeding or Bottle-Feeding (Without Using Your Phone)
For a true digital detox, go back to basics. Dads and partners – if you’re helping with bottle-feeding, you can try these too.
1. Talk Or Sing to Your Baby
Babies learn so much for the way we, as parents, communicate with them. Try singing your favourite songs or nursery rhymes to them as you’re breastfeeding (or bottle-feeding). If you go to baby rhyme time or signing classes, it’s a good time to practise those songs as well. Or go for a totally made-up song!
2. Try A Crossword or Sudoku Puzzle
Have a puzzle book to hand on the side of the sofa which you can flick to easily. While this might feel a bit ‘old-fashioned’, your eyes (and brain) will thank you for the break from navigating the screen on your phone.
3. Solve A Rubix Cube
Ever wanted to actually learn how to solve more than one side on a Rubix cube? Well, now’s the time to try it! Your baby will need to be asleep on you so you can use both hands. Or you might have some other ‘vintage’ puzzles hanging round your house like those metal puzzles or wooden mazes that you’ve never had the chance to sit down and actually do.
4. Mix Up The Music
If you have a digital radio at home, it’s a great time to switch to your favourite station and just enjoy listening to whatever music or chat they have going on. Maternity and paternity leave can also be an opportunity to dig out those old CDS and see if you want to keep them. Why not work through your collection one at a time? Music can be relaxing for baby. Or go vintage if you have a record player.
If Spotify playlists are more your thing, why not set one up on a nearby laptop or computer so you don’t have to use your phone?
5. Meditate
Practising your breathing, looking out of the window, thinking about things to be grateful for…these are all ways you can begin to pause and be mindful as you’re feeding your baby. You could try the five senses activity here to bring you into the moment – five things you can see, hear, smell, taste and touch. Or you can make a list of things you can feel happy or grateful about.
6. Use A Spiky Ball
If you have one of those spiky balls from Pilates or yoga, you can roll it under your feet to help release those fascia and aching muscles. Spiky balls are also great for releasing tension in your calves and back (try shuffling one behind your upper back while on the sofa or a chair and rolling it up and down slightly – be careful not to wake baby!).
7. Have A Good Chat With A Friend Or Family Member
In those early days especially, you’ll be feeding your baby a lot. Invite a friend or family member round for a coffee, snuggle up with your baby on the sofa, and have a good old chew of the cud.
Twelve Fun And Easy Things To Do While Breastfeeding Or Bottle-Feeding Which Do Use Your Phone
If you are going to use your phone either during or after feeding your baby, try and be mindful in the way you use it. This can be as simple as thinking ‘I’ll look up X on the NHS website’ (but not Google everything anyone has ever uploaded on the subject) or ‘I’ll read this blog post on Y and then put the phone down.’
1. Complete A Wordle
You can take as long as you need to solve these daily puzzles so Wordle is a good one to start and pause if you need to. You can create a simple log in to keep track of how you do, or just start afresh every day.
2. Arrange A Coffee Or Playdate With Another Parent
Using your phone to arrange a face-to-face meet-up is a great use of tech. Rather than having really long conversations digitally, save some of those topics for a walk or coffee.
3. Send a WhatsApp Voice Note
Instead of typing and getting cramp in your hand, you can respond to those well-wishers on WhatsApp by recording a quick voice note. Easy for you, and lovely for others to hear your voice (and baby’s gurgles).
4. Listen to a Spotify Playlist, Podcast or Audio Book
If your baby regularly feeds and falls asleep for half an hour or longer, why not catch up on a favourite podcast or audio book? There are some great ones out there, from fictional thrillers to practical life advice and humorous takes on parenthood.
5. Book A Baby Class
Baby massage, baby sensory and baby rhyme time are all really popular for young babies. Read more about the benefits of baby classes here and search here to find a baby class near you.
6. Read A Regular Newsletter Or Blog Update
If you subscribe to a regular blog, this can be a good time to follow the links in the emails they send and catch up for the week. You can subscribe to our Happity newsletter here, or read our blog posts. We also love this parenting blog by Janet Lansbury and decluttering advice for busy mums by Erica Layne.
7. Do An Online Shop Or Food Order
Some parents do actually find this fun! There’s something satisfying about ticking something off your to-do list and knowing that food will turn up at some point over the next few days.
8. Use your Favourite Mindfulness App
Whether it’s a meditation app like Headspace or another mindfulness app, now can be a good time to get into the zone as you and your baby are relaxed and chilled out. Try watching this video from The School of Life on managing your mood and tips to stay present. Or have a go at this two-minute letting go of self-critical thoughts exercise.
9. Have A Go At The Guardian Crossword Online
It’s not as tricky as it sounds! You can opt for the quick cryptic crossword and reveal the answers online too when you’ve had enough. Or you can go for the full cryptic crossword.
10. Play Chess Or Scrabble Online
Give your mind a workout while your body is resting. With chess, you can choose to play online against a person of similar ability, a bot (the computer) or you can invite a friend to play along too.
11. Watch/Listen To A TED Talk
TED talks have something for everyone with topics ranging from AI and democracy to smartphones and K-pop. If you want to avoid staring at a screen, the beauty of TED talks is that you can put the phone down and listen to them instead.
12. Learn A New Language
With Duolingo, the world’s your oyster when it comes to language learning. Fancy giving Welsh, Portuguese or High Valyrian a try? Well, now you can. And who knows, maybe some of that second language learning will filter through to your baby too (and exposing them to the sounds of different languages can be really helpful). Just turn the sound off if your baby is actually asleep!
What Should You Not Do While Breastfeeding?
Here are few things you should try to avoid while breast or bottle-feeding:
Drinking really hot cups of tea or coffee near your baby! Always put the cup on the side away from your baby and wait for it to cool down before even picking it up
Holding your phone near or above your baby’s head. You’ll be amazed at how many stories we’ve heard of mums actually dropping their phones on their baby because they’re using one hand!
Doing activities that actually take the focus away from your baby in the first instance.
Multitasking if you don’t actually find it fun! There’s nothing wrong with sitting there and ‘relaxing’ (i.e. staring like a zombie on the sofa for half an hour while you regroup).
Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5’s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
What Are 16 Quick Money-Saving Tips For Maternity Leave?
With the current cost of living, you’re probably wondering how you can save money while you’re on maternity leave.
The beauty of maternity leave is that you don’t have to worry about rushing from A to B. You can literally go at your baby’s pace. With this you can save money on transport, entertainment and food during your maternity leave. Read on for sixteen top money-saving tips while on maternity leave.
Looking for fun activities with your baby or toddler? There are thousands of classes and groups on Happity. Find one you’ll love here.
1. Make A Budget
You’ll probably go on maternity leave a few weeks before your actual due date, so use this time to plan a simple budget. Work out how much money you will be paid over maternity leave, then divide by the number of months or weeks for a rough guide of how much you can spend. Add in any savings (if you have them) that you want to include as part of your budget.
Statutory maternity pay lasts for up to 39 weeks. Remember you’ll be paid more for the first 6 weeks of your maternity leave. If you take the full year, the last few months are likely to be unpaid. So it’s helpful to have a week-by-week or month-by-month average so you can budget better towards the start of your maternity leave.
2. Review Finances
Check you will have enough in your bank account or savings to cover rent or mortgage payments, food and bills. Also budget for other essentials like clothes and milk for baby. If you have a partner, it can be helpful to sit down with them and decide (particularly if you have individual accounts) whether you need to set up a joint account for household payments. Your partner may decide to transfer a certain amount of money per month if certain direct debits come out of your account. After all, maternity pay is a cut to your pay even though you are doing the essential job of bringing a new life into this world!
Remember to check any benefits you are on and how they might change once your baby is born. See our guide to benefits for more.
3. Make Sure You Claim Child Benefit And Any Other Benefits
Be sure to claim child benefit, which is £25.60 per week for the eldest child and £16.95 for additional children. See our blog post on how to claim and other benefits you can apply for.
4. Make Larger Purchases Before You Go On Maternity Leave
If you have your heart set on a particular piece of baby equipment like a cot, travel system or furniture for the nursery, try and buy this while you have your usual, regular income. Some people don’t like buying ‘early’ but a month or so before you go on maternity leave can be a helpful time to buy so you don’t splurge your budget in the very first week!
5. Shop Purposefully When Buying New
It can be really tempting to rush out and buy loads of baby stuff the minute you go on maternity leave (or learn that you are pregnant). While it’s important to have essentials like nappies, clothes and a cot, try holding out a bit and seeing what friends and family give you. Some will want to buy you/the baby a present so newborn sleepsuits, cellular blankets and cardigans will probably be coming your way!
If you live in Scotland, you will be sent a Baby Box with essentials for the first 6 months of baby’s life.
6. Try Second-Hand For Large Items
NCT (National Childbirth Trust) Nearly New sales are a great place to buy second-hand equipment like high chairs, clothing, baby bouncers, potties and toys.
If you have friends who have had a baby recently, you can ask them about larger equipment like prams or electronic breast pumps. They may even have bags of extra nappies or maternity essentials and clothing. Make sure you always buy brand-new mattresses as these are safest for newborn sleeping. See The Lullaby Trust for safer sleeping tips. It’s also recommended for car seats to be new, as they are guaranteed to be in perfect condition and therefore are safer for your baby.
7. Shop Around For Discounts – Use Baby Deals
All that feeding, sleeping and holding baby gives you a bit of time for shopping on your phone! Take advantage of sales and deals and go to baby screenings for cheap cinema tickets.
If you’re a member of the NCT (National Childbirth Trust), they will often have special offers and discounts. Also check out Happity for our partner deals on top child and parenting brands. One that could come in particularly handy is the PACT coffee deal… which parent doesn’t need more coffee right. You also get a free personal cafetière with any purchase when using the code HAPPITYCAF24!
8. Plan Ahead When Cooking
Ditch the takeaways and try to plan ahead when food shopping. Batch cooking can also be helpful. If you or your partner are cooking something like a spaghetti bolognese sauce, try and double or triple up on quantities. Then you can have one portion for the fridge/the next day, one for the freezer and one to eat right now.
Take advantage of recipe box offers like this Hello Fresh one here on Happity.
9. Remember Your Maternity Exemption Certificate For Prescription Costs
Your maternity exemption certificate (MATEX) is valid until your baby’s first birthday. You can use this during pregnancy as well for free NHS prescriptions and free NHS dental treatment.
10. Block Book Classes
Block booking classes will lead to a saving as it’s usually cheaper than PAYG (Pay As You Go). A weekly class gives you a regular time to be with your baby and meet other parents in a relaxed setting. Search here for baby classes near you.
11. Save Money On Transport During Maternity Leave
If you were used to ubers and eating out pre-baby, there’s a money saver right there! While it’s easy and quick to jump in the car, there are ways to use your car more frugally and build travel into your day-to-day routine.
If you’re heading for a baby class in the local area, see if you can walk. It may take longer, but it frees you up as you can be leisurely on the way home without worrying about car parking charges. It can actually be easier to tuck a sleepy baby into a pram instead of a car seat. You’ll also get in your steps on the way there and back. If you’ve booked a morning class and your baby usually has a mid-morning nap, the walk home can be all they need to get snoozing (particularly if they’ve just had a stimulating baby class!) Or you can be flexible and hang around with other parents afterwards and see where the day takes you.
Under 5s travel free on buses and trains, so you’re only paying for an adult ticket. Baby carriers are easiest to use on this form of transport. If you need the pram, ask for help at the station and they should provide a ramp.
12. Use Your Keeping In Touch Days
Companies and organisations will usually offer up to ten ‘Keeping In Touch’ (KIT) days during your maternity leave. If you can, use them. That’s ten days of paid work, which can give a much-appreciated cash boost. This can be especially helpful if you are in the statutory maternity pay period or unpaid weeks towards the end of your leave. KIT days should be that – keeping in touch – so you won’t be thrown in at the deep end.
If you’re worried about childcare, it’s an ideal time to ask a friend or relative to help babysit. Or your partner can take a day’s holiday and that way you both get paid on those days.
13. Cash In Rewards And Vouchers
Now’s a good time to use all those loyalty cards for local cafes that you have digitally or stuffed at the bottom of your bag.
If you collect Tesco Clubcard points, you can trade them in for two times their value to save on entertainment, dining and days out. Or use Nectar card to save money during your maternity leave on a Sainsbury’s shop, Morrison’s More cards for discounts when shopping and myWaitrose for free hot drinks. Also check out cashback websites.
14. Check Your Bank Account Perks
Some bank accounts like Halifax will offer cashback when you use a debit card for some goods and services. If you haven’t shopped around for a current account recently, now might be the time to consider a switch. It’s also worth checking you’re getting the best energy deal for your home on Uswitch.
15. Raid The Cash
If you’re a fan of Sort Your Life Out, you’ll be amazed how much cash the average family has lying around in their homes. Now’s the time to raid the piggy banks, back of the sofa and deposit that money in a bank account, or do some cash food shops at the supermarket.
16. Be Savvy About Shared Parental Leave
Want to go back to work ‘early’ without racking up childcare costs? Shared Parental Leave could be an option for you. Basically you agree to grant the remainder of your maternity leave to your partner as Shared Parental Leave while you go back to work. So, for example, if you have reached 9 months, you can grant the remaining 3 months to your partner. This will still be unpaid, but if you’re in a job which pays more, you’ll both benefit from that higher salary for the time you go back. Your baby will be with a parent, and you’ll be saving money on childcare costs.
If grandparents are able to do childcare and you both want to go to work, that’s another option. However, the advantage of shared parental leave is that you both get some dedicated parental leave with your baby before their first birthday.
How Much Money Do I Need To Save For Maternity Leave?
A couple of months’ salary put away in the bank is probably a great safety net to aim for. But with the cost of living these days, saving your hard-earned cash isn’t always an option. So try and be as savvy as possible in the months leading up to maternity leave. Anything you can stash or save will be a bonus for those later weeks and months. Some parents will go back to work after 39 weeks (or earlier) once their Statutory Maternity Pay (SMP) runs out. Others will take the full 52 weeks of Statutory Maternity Leave, which includes the thirteen week unpaid period.
How Much Is The Average Maternity Leave Pay UK?
Maternity pay may vary depending on your individual employer. While Statutory Maternity Pay (SMP) is usually 90% of your salary for the first 6 weeks, some employers may offer ‘enhanced maternity pay’ of 100% for this period. This is then followed by the usual SMP of £184.03 or 90% of an employee’s Average Weekly Earnings (AWE) (whichever is lower).
In one recent study, it was estimated that two-thirds of businesses may offer a form of enhanced maternity pay, with some offering full pay for longer periods of time than six weeks. However, this is often dependent on the parent returning to work at the same business following their maternity leave.
Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
You’ve had your first baby and you’ve just about got to grips with parenthood, and the question pops into your head, “am I ready for another baby?”
We chatted to members of Team Happity to get the low-down on what it’s really like to add a second baby into the mix – and some things we wish we’d known before going from one to two!
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1. Make The Most Of The First Few Sleepy Baby Weeks
“I was fortunate enough that my older toddler was in nursery a couple of days a week and I used those days to regroup and rest. The transition from one to two actually felt easier than zero to one child. I was expecting and planning for a nightmare situation and it wasn’t quite so bad as I was already used to sleep deprivation and my lifestyle had naturally adapted more towards having little ones.”
– Sally, Team Happity
2. Accept Help And Support
“Take all the support you can get. I remember being very conscious not to disturb my husband while he was working and I was looking after the kids. Even when I was really struggling. I was talking to my best friend who had her second shortly after me, and she thought I was insane! She pulled her own husband out of the home office every five seconds to help her get shoes on, put the buggy in the car, hold the baby while she made lunch etc. If you’re struggling, it’s not because you’re bad at it, it’s because it’s a really exhausting job.”
– Lisa, Team Happity
“I didn’t like disturbing my husband either at work unless it was a poonami situation and I literally had no hands! I do remember ringing him from the park once on the way back from nursery to bring a fresh change of clothes (luckily he was home that day even though it was pre-Covid). So top tip – always carry spare clothes that fit both the baby and the toddler. In fact, carry two spare sets.”
– Liz, Team Happity
3. Be Savvy When Using Parental Leave
“My husband had four weeks of paternity leave. We decided to split this to cover the times that we felt would be hardest – right at the beginning and after about 3 months when the sleep deprivation hits and the new baby visits wane. Then definitely rope in friends and grandparents for play dates, to cook meals, tidy up etc.”
– Sally, Team Happity
“I’m very fortunate that Ceris has amazing paternity leave so she will be off for five months which is going to be a huge help! I said I want to try and prioritise a certain amount of time each day dedicated to Hugh so he still gets some quality play time with me.”
– Kate, Team Happity
4. Be Ready To Team Tag
“With just over two years between them, I remember (and we still do this to some extent) the feeling of ‘tag teaming’ two adults with two very young children. And the times when we’d have both on changing mats, or one in the bath and one on the changing mat, only to swap them over a few minutes later. Or how one would nap, and then the other wouldn’t drop off until after the first one woke up. If you’re a single parent, I definitely recommend surrounding yourself with some extra people whenever possible and be ready to pass the baton. If I did it again, I’d ask for more help and probably invite friends and grandparents round more often.”
– Liz, Team Happity
5. Don’t Worry About Taking Shortcuts – It Doesn’t Have To Be Perfect
“I wish I’d made more decisions to prioritise my mental health and state of calm than do something because they seemed like the ‘good mum’ choices. I remember trying to convince Lucy to play quietly on the floor with blocks while I got Ollie to sleep. Or to eat a different highly nutritious meal every night even though she was incredibly fussy. I wish I had just let her watch Peppa Pig while I was dealing with Ollie, and given her more pasta. Our relationship would have suffered less through the process!”
– Lisa, Team Happity
6. Lower Your Expectations/Take Off The Pressure
“Don’t try and do too much or put pressure on yourself. One thing I learnt from baby number one was that babies don’t really follow plans. That’s hard for someone who is a real organiser! So try and take opportunities to do things as and when time, tantrums, feeding etc. allows whether that’s cooking, cleaning or leaving the house to do something.
“Work out your coping strategies. Maybe certain toys or games distract well or getting out of the house at particular times works well. I definitely agree bedtime is a tough part of the day, particularly if you’re doing it solo, so work out a good system and how to approach that. You might need to try a few things until you find something that works, although be aware that will probably change as the kids change too!”
– Sally, Team Happity
7. Leave Loads Of Extra Time
“I realised that one activity a day (e.g. a class, meeting with friends, trip to library, ‘quick’ pop to the shops or a walk) was just about manageable, but to leave loads of time and flexibility and see how the day unfolds. That can feel very liberating.”
– Liz, Team Happity
“Leave a good few hours to get ready to leave the house for even the smallest of trips!”
– Sally, Team Happity
8. Be Prepared To Multitask
“Our youngest needed movement in the pram or car to get her to sleep in the first place for naps. Just holding her and swaying wouldn’t cut it, so I’d have to drag the two-year-old out as well, whatever the weather.”
– Liz, Team Happity
“As Joely will be four and a half years older than her baby sister I’m expecting her to be a big help as she LOVES babies and is very excited to hold and play with her. Bedtime is going to be tricky! I put my daughter to bed every night and still co-sleep so no idea how this one is going to pan out.”
– Lucy, Team Happity
9. Remember Your Eldest Child Is Still Young Too
“It’s quite easy to start seeing your older one as a ‘big girl or boy’ who should know better. You have to keep reminding yourself that they are a child too and can’t regulate their emotions or control their impulses. I think a good way to prepare would be to read a book on exactly what happens in a child’s brain when they get a new sibling. There’s a Sarah Ockwell-Smith one which is supposed to be good. And (this sounds a bit weird) but keep looking at them. Remind yourself how little they are – it’s easy to forget when you’re doing a million other things.”
– Lisa, Team Happity
“I have been chatting to friends and family about the transition from one to two and have been warned that Hugh may revert back with his behaviour and ways and this is completely normal but it soon settles back down.”
– Kate, Team Happity
10. …So Give Your Older Child Lots Of Attention
“There’s definitely something in ‘managing’ the older child a bit so they don’t feel pushed out. My friend sent me a list of dos and don’ts which helped me be more conscious of the relationship between the older sibling and the baby. Getting them involved in looking after the baby was good. We also made sure visitors made plenty of fuss of our older child when they came round.”
– Sally, Team Happity
“People have said that when baby does arrive, guests should always engage with Hugh first so he doesn’t feel pushed out or replaced.”
– Kate, Team Happity
11. …And Avoid ‘Blaming’ Baby
“I have read you should not ‘blame’ baby for why you cannot help or play straight away. So avoid, ‘I can’t play right now as I’m feeding the baby’ or ‘I need to get baby to sleep’.”
– Kate, Team Happity
“Maybe it’s a case of dropping ‘baby’ off the end of the sentence, or saying something positive like ‘I can come and play in a few minutes. Can you get some toys ready?’”
– Liz, Team Happity
12. Double The Work? Try And Double Up On Everything
“I remember a family friend saying, ‘You didn’t tell me it would be double the work with a second one!’ But she went on to have third, so it couldn’t have been all bad.
“While it can feel like a lot of work, I also think you can ‘double up’ to some extent. If you have two close in age, feed them together, bathe them together, find activities they both enjoy. In the long run, I do think it’s good for each child to get a sense of ‘fitting in’ a bit with their sibling or siblings as that can help them adapt to new situations.
“If you’re breastfeeding a baby, use that time to sit and read with your eldest – they can snuggle up next to you on the sofa. Or you can watch them play/chat to them while you’re feeding. If there’s a bigger age gap, involve the second child in the usual daily routine of the first one. Walking to school? Use that as time for your youngest to nap in the pram, or drop in on the park on the way back. Going to an after-school club or activity? This can be precious time spent ambling round town or feeding the ducks with child number two.”
– Liz, Team Happity
13. Trust That You’re More Experienced Than You Think
“As you’ve already gone through all the milestones – sleeping, feeding, jabs, nappies, teething – with one baby already, that really helps as you’re more prepared for what to do with the new baby. I remember thinking with the second, ‘Oh, I remember this from the first time round. We tried x, y, and z.”
– Liz, Team Happity
14. Ditch The Guilt
“You have to ignore some of the parent guilt. There’ll most definitely be times where you have to prioritise one child over the other. This might mean the baby is safe and ok but crying or the toddler is kicking around bored. Remember you don’t have a choice so you can’t feel bad about it. It’s usually only for a short time – although it can feel like forever if you’ve got a crying baby and toddler having a meltdown at the same time.”
– Sally, Team Happity
15. Keep Playing And Stay Positive
“Don’t forget to try and still have fun. If your older child is getting tricky, put on some music or distract them with something fun that you can do. Find things you can all do together. I worked out what I could do one-handed breastfeeding that still felt like I was engaging with my older one. We did a lot of jigsaws and puzzle games.”
– Sally, Team Happity
“As an eternal optimist I always think it’s going to be “ok” but everyone always says what a big adjustment it is having two over one. I luckily have my mum around the corner to help and my husband will have to be on top of his game.”
– Lucy, Team Happity
So there we have Team Happity’s advice. It can definitely feel like a bit of a never ending cycle on some days, but it’s also good to know that with every new milestone the children reach, that this feeling doesn’t last forever. This too shall pass! It will be messy at times, but so is life. Everyone will learn something from whatever happens as you navigate the exhausting, fun, exciting journey from one to two.
Are Kids Happier With More Siblings?
There has been loads of research into what makes children happy. Of course children can be happy with or without siblings and with one, two, or even three or more parental figures.
Some studies say that the number of children makes no difference to educational outcomes or personality, though birth order can sometimes make a slight difference to motivation. Some studies suggest that children can actually be better off as only children . Others look at the long-lasting benefits of positive sibling relationships and what children can learn from conflict resolution.
At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter whether you have one, two, three or five children as long as they have love and strong, parental or family relationships. Remember they will have friends, and for some children, friends or cousins can be like siblings too. It’s what they learn from these relationships and interactions (both positive and negative) that counts.
What’s The Ideal Age Gap Between Siblings?
Experts do recommend leaving around 18 months between pregnancies to give your body more time to recover fully . You’re also then less likely to have a preterm birth or low birthweight – particularly if you’re over 35.
Some parents say that three years is a good age gap. It’s close enough that your children will still have similar interests, but not so close that they will want to compete with each other (well, not all the time!) But loads of siblings have just a couple of years between them and get on well doing similar activities as they grow up together.
Research has shown that a gap of around two-and-a-half years can be beneficial for both children. A gap of four or five years (or more) is also really common. Check here for all the pros and cons of different age gaps. But try not to overthink it!
Your child will always have same-age peers at school to do things with, so don’t worry if you haven’t had a second baby at the time you expected. The majority of parents can’t choose anyway – families come in all shapes and sizes and no one size fits all.
Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
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