Is it possible to survive (and even enjoy) visiting family at Christmas when you have a young baby? Of course it is! We’re joined by Catherine Wasley AKA The Parent Rock, who’s here to explain how relatives, babies and Christmas really can be a winning combination. You just need a few tricks up your sleeve and tools for dealing with all that well-meant advice.
Looking for festive fun to feel the Christmas Spirit with your baby or toddler? It’s never to early to book a Christmas class on Happity. Find one you’ll love here.
Can I Really Go Away At Christmas To Visit Relatives With a Young Baby?
Picture this: your little one is finally settled in for a nap after arriving for Christmas at your uncle’s home, but then a well-meaning relative just can’t resist peeking in, and… goodbye, peaceful hour! Sound familiar?
The festive season is all about joy, family, and good food – but add a baby into the mix, and it can quickly become overwhelming. When my children were young, I encountered a constant stream of advice and comments from sleep routines to eating habits and everything in between. The additional stress of being away from the comfort and safety of home made it all the more challenging.
As a mum of four and a holistic sleep coach, I know first-hand how these situations can unravel even the best-laid plans. In this article, I’ll share practical tips to help you navigate the holiday season smoothly, so you and your baby can stay rested and enjoy the festivities stress-free.
So let’s start with ‘the getting there’!
How Can I Prepare To Travel A Long Distance by Car with a Baby?
Hitting the road with a baby can be overwhelming, especially during the busy holiday season. Here are some practical tips to make your car journey smoother.
Plan Your Route and Breaks: Before you set out, map your route and identify rest stops. It’s essential to schedule breaks every two hours, as research has shown a link between extended periods in car seats and breathing difficulties in young babies.
Pack Wisely: Create a travel kit with essentials your baby might need, including nappies, wipes, at least one change of clothes for the inevitable nappy tsunamis, food for weaning, formula, and anything else necessary. Keeping these items easily accessible can help reduce stress during unexpected stops.
Timing Is Key: Try to schedule your travel around your baby’s nap times when possible. If you’re travelling later at night, consider putting your baby to bed at their normal time and then transferring them to the car for the drive.
Entertainment and Distraction: Bring along toys, soothing music, or baby-friendly audiobooks to keep your little one entertained. Feel free to include a round of nursery rhymes sung by you!
Stay Calm: While this is easier said than done, your baby can pick up on your stress, so aim to remain relaxed. If your baby becomes upset, take deep breaths and reassure them with your voice or touch. Remember, it’s perfectly okay to pull over if you need to: this can help everyone rebalance when things start to feel chaotic.
How Do I Cope With Disruption Of My Baby’s Usual Routine?
Changes in routine, especially around sleep schedules, are common concerns when visiting family during the holidays. While it may be challenging to maintain your baby’s usual routine in a different environment, keeping some consistency can make things smoother for both you and your little one.
Tip: It’s not always possible to stick strictly to your baby’s schedule during family visits, but try to follow the usual flow of the day as much as you can. Some babies handle small changes, like slightly longer stretches between naps, with ease. Others might be more sensitive and require closer attention to their routine.
Remember, you know your baby best, so feel confident prioritising what works for them, even if it means making adjustments to the day’s activities. Don’t hesitate to have open conversations with relatives about your baby’s needs. Asking about the day’s plan will help you prepare and ensure things run more smoothly.
And if your baby’s routine gets shaken up? Don’t stress – it’s only temporary. Once you’re back home, your baby will settle back into their normal rhythm in no time.
How Do I Plan And Manage Naps?
Worrying about how naps will go amid the unpredictability of a busy house is completely normal. Some babies are flexible about where they nap and can handle disruptions to nap schedules. But other babies are more sensitive, and that’s completely normal. Your baby’s temperament and usual nap habits will play a big part in how they handle changes.
Tip: If your baby typically naps in a cot and you’re worried about them napping on the go, try practising one nap a day in a carrier or pram before your visit. This way, they get used to different environments. If naps go off-track while you’re away, aim for at least one solid nap a day. And remember, a bad day of naps isn’t the end of the world. Stay calm and plan for a more restful day the next day to help them catch up.
It’s important to remember that your job is to provide the nap opportunity, but it’s your baby’s job to decide whether or not to sleep. You can’t force sleep, even when you know they need it! Also, don’t forget: a nap is a nap, whether it’s in the buggy, carrier, car, or a contact nap. They all count.
How Can I Prioritise Time Outside Every Day?
Getting outside can be a challenge, especially when you’re staying with family across multiple generations – and when some are more mobile than others. However, making time for outdoor activities, particularly in the morning, can greatly benefit both you and your baby. Exposure to natural daylight helps regulate your baby’s circadian rhythm, which hopefully will result in sleep going as predicted. Plus it’s also a fantastic mental boost for you, reducing stress and improving mood, which makes it easier to manage the hectic nature of holiday visits.
Tip: Even 20 minutes of fresh air can make a significant difference in helping your baby adapt to a new routine. Bringing a sling or pram will not only help you get out and about but it’s the perfect way for your baby to catch a nap while you’re outside. Whether it’s a brisk walk around the block or a trip to a nearby park, this time outside is a win-win for both you and your baby.
How Do I Deal With Unsolicited Advice From Relatives?
We’ve all been there – family gathering, when a well-meaning relative chimes in with advice that, while given with good intentions (generally!), can make you feel like you’re not doing enough as a parent. But remember: no one knows your child better than you.
It’s important to recognise that every child is different, and what worked for Aunt Susan’s baby 30 years ago may not work for yours. So when the unsolicited advice starts rolling in, it’s okay to acknowledge it with grace while standing firm in your choices.
Tip: Politely thank them for their input and confidently explain that you’ve found what works best for your child. You might say something like, “I understand that approach works for some children, but we’ve found a different method that really suits our little one. I appreciate your advice, though!”
This response shows both confidence in your parenting and respect for the other person’s intention. And remember, it’s perfectly fine to set boundaries that align with your values. Parenting is not one-size-fits-all!
How Do I Avoid Overstimulation For My Baby When Visiting Family For Christmas?
Family gatherings can be fun but also a bit overwhelming for little ones, especially when they’re not used to all the noise and activity. It’s a common worry for parents that their baby will become overstimulated during festive get-togethers.
Tip: Create a plan to avoid overstimulation by setting up a designated quiet space where you and your baby can retreat when the festivities get too lively. Bringing along familiar comfort items, like your baby’s favourite toy or blanket, can help them feel more secure.
When things get too overwhelming, don’t hesitate to say, “I’m going to take [baby’s name] out for a quick breather. No need to worry, they just need a little downtime.” Not only does this allow your baby a chance to recalibrate, but it also reassures your relatives that you have the situation under control.
Being mindful of your baby’s early signs of overstimulation – like fussiness or turning away from people – can help you step in before things escalate. Remember, it’s perfectly okay to take breaks as needed, and doing so will help your baby (and you) enjoy the festivities.
How Can I Get My Baby Used To Sleeping in a Different Place?
Getting your baby to sleep in an unfamiliar environment is a common concern – and for good reason. Many parents find that new surroundings can cause difficulties. Personally, I found that my children as babies always struggled on the first night in a new place, despite my best efforts.
Tip 1: Create a Familiar Sleep Space Once you arrive, prioritise setting up your baby’s sleep space. Introduce your baby to it while they’re still awake and alert, so it feels familiar. Try to follow your usual bedtime routine with as many familiar items as possible. Bringing bedding from home can offer the comfort of familiar smells and textures.
One of my top tips is investing in a travel blackout blind. Even if the room has curtains, they’re often not dark enough. Choose one with sturdy suction pads for better light-blocking. Don’t forget a white noise machine to drown out any noise from loud relatives.
Tip 2: Longer Wind Down & Later Bedtime If your baby tends to have difficulty sleeping in new places, consider a longer wind-down routine before bed. Set up a quiet, dimly-lit room away from the excitement to help your baby relax. You might also try delaying bedtime slightly. That extra bit of sleep pressure can make it easier for your baby to drift off in an unfamiliar environment. This can be especially useful for babies who are more alert or anxious when away from home. And don’t rush bedtime. It can be tempting to speed things up, especially with the waft of mulled wine in the air, but taking your time will ultimately pay off. A calm relaxed bedtime routine can help your baby drift off to sleep more smoothly.
How Do I Practise Self-Care When Away From Home With A Baby?
Don’t forget about you! In the whirlwind of family gatherings and caring for your little one, it’s easy to neglect your own needs – but remember, your well-being is just as important. If the holiday hustle starts to feel overwhelming or you find yourself drained from handling night wakings and an unsettled baby, it’s perfectly okay to take a break. Babies often require more reassurance in unfamiliar surroundings, especially with so many people around, which can lead to them becoming overstimulated and clingier than usual. This heightened need for comfort can be incredibly exhausting for you both physically and mentally.
Tip: Take advantage of having family around. Let a trusted relative keep an eye on your baby while you take some much-needed time for yourself. Whether it’s going for a short walk, grabbing a coffee, or even sneaking in a quick nap, these small moments of self-care can recharge your energy and help you tackle the rest of the day. Remember, stepping away for a little ‘me time’ isn’t just good for you. It benefits your baby too, as you’ll be more present and patient when you return.
Your Festive Takeaway
Visiting relatives during the festive period can be a wonderful experience for families, but it does come with more than its fair share of challenges. As you navigate these hurdles with these practical tips in mind, remember that your role as the expert on your baby is invaluable.
Stand tall, embrace the uniqueness of your parenting journey, and make choices that prioritise the wellbeing and happiness of your little one.
And have yourself a merry little Christmas!
Thanks To Catherine Wasley – The Parent Rock
Catherine Wasley, also known as The Parent Rock, is a certified OCN Level 6 holistic sleep coach with a passion for helping families achieve their sleep goals. With over 30 years of experience working with young families and as a mum of four, Catherine combines extensive knowledge with a compassionate, personalised approach to sleep coaching.She offers 1:1 sessions with parents, providing gentle and effective strategies tailored to each family’s unique needs. For support and resources, visit www.theparentrock.com and grab your free guide to better sleep.
Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5’s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
With so many people working remotely these days, the culture of flexibly working from home is stronger than it has ever been.
At Happity it was really important to our co-founders, Sara and Emily, that their business was built with flexible working patterns. As busy working mums, they knew the benefits of flexible working.
So here’s why we love flexible, remote and hybrid working here at Team Happity:
Looking for fun activities with your baby or toddler? There are thousands of classes and groups on Happity. Find one you’ll love here.
1. Freedom To Work How You Want, When You Want
“I love the flexibility of my role. Having a nearly three-year-old (he was just turning one when I started) has allowed me to spend quality time with my son whilst having some independence with a job. The remote and flexible role meant I could work my hours around him. So there has never been any pressure if Hugh had had to be around or I’ve had to tweak my hours or days. It’s been a very refreshing way to work, not having fixed nine-to-fives where you must be here mentality. I have the freedom to do my hours at a time that suits.”
– Kate Falshaw, Happity’s Admin Assistant
2. Home Comforts And Productivity
“I personally love remote working as it means I can be home in a comfortable environment with my space exactly how I like it. It can be very messy so there’s the added bonus not having co-workers see my ‘creative process’). I have kids and dogs so it’s nice to know I don’t need to get back from an office to sort the dogs out or have to pick my boys up early from school if they’re ill.
“I’m a lot more productive from home as being a coder is about working alone a fair bit of the time and switching off the distractions around you. So I can turn my music up and focus so much better than I could when I worked in an office environment. The chorus of dogs snoring is very comforting!”
– Becky,Happity’s Coding Alchemist
3. Time To Live Your Life
“From my perspective, having the ability to work from home and flexibly really does help me to fit my work around my personal life (not the other way round, which my previous jobs often did!) I’m currently doing the same kind of hours that I was doing in a previous retail job, and yet I’m now spending a bit more time doing the things I love like my hobbies or spending time with my loved ones. Plus, I actually have more energy to do them. Now that I’ve started flexible/remote working, I’m keen to carry on doing it!
“Working fully remotely helps me with my productivity, but there are times when it really helps to see your colleagues in your work day. Zoom calls are great, but they lack the chit-chat that can really help to relieve stress. We’ve started using a co-working space this year and it’s been really lovely to have one day every week (or every other week if schedules get busier) where a number of the Happity team can meet up and just work alongside each other. I always come away from those days feeling pretty positive (makes it worth that jam-packed London commute!)”
– Leanne,Happity’s Marketing Specialist
4. Flexible Childcare
“It’s different for me now that the kids are older, but basing this more on when they were younger.
“Firstly, it is really really hard to work from home if your kids are also home. You definitely need a childcare plan. Secondly, I would flex my hours so that I could spend some time with them during the week to help reduce childcare requirements. This involved doing some of my hours at the weekend, early morning or late evening where possible, or reducing working hours overall and taking some unpaid leave (parental leave).
“For childcare, I used grandparents, playdate swaps, Bubble babysitting app (basically someone to come here and entertain them whilst I was working) and holiday camps. We had childcare vouchers in those days(!) so would save those up to cover the holiday camps. I’d typically aim for three full days of childcare each week, one day with the kids myself or with my husband, and one day with grandparents or a playdate.
“Lastly, for the summer holidays, we’d plan for two weeks of family holiday and annual leave in the summer period. Even though travelling is more expensive versus other times of the year, I figure you’re at least offsetting the cost of childcare in those weeks anyway.
“Incidentally, when you have younger nursery-aged children this isn’t really a problem because nurseries are generally open all summer anyway!”
– Sara,Happity’s Co-Founder
5. Stealth Working
“I pretty much agree with Sara but like you say everyone’s experience is different so…
“Totally agree that you can’t work with young kids around (hence our policy on that to arrange dedicated childcare!) When my son was younger I’d arrange grandparents or clubs during the week to get my hours in. In the holidays it’s grandparents, camps and playdates at other people’s houses. We likewise would do two to three days of camp, one to two days with grandparents, and I’d have one day with him in the week. Or sometimes does three LONG days so I managed two days off with him.
“Now my son is older I can work well when he is around AS LONG as I’ve arranged a playdate. If he is just around alone it doesn’t work (I feel guilty more than anything). But since the summer when he was eight and a half years old and I arranged a day off work to host a playdate and found myself working anyway as they REALLY didn’t want me around anymore, this does work. I just need to pop in to check if they need food and drink mid-morning and afternoon, and make them lunch.
“However, I do find this is harder on my energy as I don’t then get a proper lunch break myself as they are around. If my husband is also working from home we will split lunch between us. In my “off” time I’ll hide in my bedroom watching trashy TV on my phone!
“I love being able to work from home. In term time I can pretty much get away without my son really noticing I work (just about…) by adding in after-school clubs and grandparents doing one pick-up a week. But it is intense. I can drive to the school pick-up and feel “zoned out” because I’ve not switched off from work, especially as I don’t take any breaks mostly during the day to get the hours in.”
– Emily, Happity’s Co-Founder
6. Inspiring Co-Working Spaces
“I love the flexibility of hybrid working, but I still like to work outside of my home. Having a four-year-old, there are often toys galore and a million little things that need doing in the house. So I work from a co-working space just down the road from my house. I’m close to school for easy pick-up and also get the experience of an office environment where I get to chat to people running lots of different businesses.
“At Happity we can chat by message or jump on a call whenever we need to bounce ideas or work through tasks, which I love!”
– Lucy Hall,Happity’s Sales and Partnerships Manager
7. No Long Commutes
“My name is Alex and I am Happity’s Customer Support Manager, mummy to a beautiful four-year-old daughter. I am what some describe as an introverted extrovert. As an ADHD individual my passions and hobbies often vary and can be fleeting! I have a huge passion for rock music and live music in general.
“I have been working remotely since I started here at Happity, over three years ago now! As a parent, remote working is a blessing and really helps me to juggle work and family life. I previously worked in central London where I had to get two trains to work every day. I didn’t quite realise the time and the toll the daily travelling was having on me until I stopped.
“While there are so many positives to remote working, there are times when I miss the in-person interaction with my colleagues, especially because they are all so lovely! There are also some occasions where working from home can affect my productivity, especially as I have ADHD. On those occasions, I will go and work from my local library for a while for the change in scenery. I do on occasion also go and use the hot desk space we have for creative strategy sessions with colleagues. The creativity really flows and bounces better in person. Overall, remote working has been very beneficial, especially as a mum. Not spending a fortune on trains is a plus!”
– Alex, Happity’s Customer Support Expert
8. Meet-Ups Are A Treat
“It’s great to have the flexibility to choose what hours to work so it fits around family life. I do two solid days and then use evenings/weekends to fit in my remaining few hours on a week-by-week basis. One thing I had to get my head around when I started was people having hours that don’t line up. So if someone is off on a day I’m working, I need to make sure I’m planning around that to get things done if I need their input. It is a bit of an adjustment for everyone working full-time in a business. It feels as though it works much better if everyone does have flexible/part-time hours because there’s less of a disconnect between someone working part-time and others who are full-time. Then everyone understands there are going to be gaps and that people might not be around.
“Time goes so quickly so I’m massively grateful to be at home with my husband and two boys. I feel as though I’m not ‘missing out’ on anything but also able to do high-level more strategic work.
“Not so much at Happity but at my last company it was hard to join a business remotely. I was managing a team of people so getting to know them, how they work, what support they needed etc. without seeing them in person was much more difficult and slower.
“I do miss having regular human contact with people. It is much trickier to make more personal connections and relationships with others as well as encourage innovation and more abstract strategic discussions. Not seeing people also makes it harder to understand their moods. You don’t always know when people need extra support and you inevitably lose a bit of empathy.
“I find having less disconnect between work and home life tricky and I don’t like not leaving the house! I have to make sure there are ways of switching between both. Going for walks in the morning/evening, having two separate profiles on my laptop etc all help. I look forward to the days when I get to meet up with people to work. It feels like a bit of a treat now!”
– Sally, Happity’s Product Manager
9. Pick-Up From School
“Flexible working is great for doing pick-up and drop-off at school – something I would have struggled with massively in previous jobs. I can also spread the hours out over more days and evenings if needed. That’s a huge benefit of remote and flexible working.
“Otherwise it can definitely feel intense to try and fit everything into school hours or during after-school clubs. The question of downtime during a ‘condensed’ day is a really interesting point.
“I agree it can feel like a ‘treat’ to meet up with colleagues in person. Possibly we are more focused because of this, and enjoy our time together socially as well. I’m looking forward to going into the office space soon and doing a bit of hybrid working once a month.”
– Liz, Happity’s Marketing Assistant
10. Inspiration
“Covid started just as I was about to go back to work after Lucy (my first), so WFH (working from home) has been the norm for me since having kids. I honestly don’t know how parents did it before!
“100% I agree you can’t work and look after small children at the same time. You need childcare even if you work from home all the time.
“My parents have Ollie two days a week while I work from their home office. This is so lovely because I get to see him at lunchtime and can hear him happily playing all day downstairs.
“Rather than work every day but finish at school pick-up, I decided to do four full days (9-5) and have one day completely off to be with the kids. This works for our family because my eldest enjoys after-school clubs. We have a lot of grandparent support to do pick-ups on other days too. There is no perfect balance between the need to pay the bills and the need to have a quality family life. You have to decide which trade-offs are right for you.
“On the flip side, I do think WFH all the time can be quite lonely. It’s also intense because there are no distractions – sometimes at the end of the day my head is spinning. Now Happity has an office I’ve really enjoyed going to. We’re a friendly bunch here but it’s still completely different chatting with someone in person than at the beginning of a call. And much more productive in some ways. I might tick fewer things off my list on an office day, but find out something in passing that helps me massively.”
– Lisa, Happity’sMarketing Manager
Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?
Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5’s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!
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